Everyone who has sex has one main goal in the end, an orgasm. A sex trend, Karezza was introduced a couple of years ago, and it has people raving about it. Karezza aims for you to feel more pleasure at the end of sex, without an orgasm. I know what you’re thinking because I thought the same, no climax?? How can it possibly be better than an orgasm?! Well, among those who are raving about it, a lot of men are the ones saying that it is better and more exciting. So what is this new interesting form of sex exactly? Karezza is a variation from the Italian word, “carezza,” meaning “caress.” It is a gentle, more affectionate, sensual kind of intercourse, where not getting an orgasm is the goal. Couples who are doing Karezza swear by it, and that they hope to never orgasm again.
Why You Don’t Climax
By removing the goal of climaxing, each person engaging in Karezza is focused on a more sensual experience. By not worrying about orgasming at the end of sex, couples focus more on pleasing the other person and receiving it back. Research shows that people value the connection more than physical release. It is more about making love, caressing, and verbal communication of love. It is focused mainly on love and increased closeness with your partner. Counselor Deb Feintech uses Karezza with her couples to revive their relationship. She said, “it’s very radical for them, but they are finding the emotional intimacy far outweighs any of the thrill of the chase and the mating mind.”
Is it Healthier?
In terms of your relationship with your partner, absolutely. Couples who are having issues within their relationship or marriage are doing Karezza as a form of therapy. The outcome is that it healed their relationships, and added more spark. Marnia Robinson, the author of Cupid’s Poisoned Arrow, in which she writes about climax-free sex, says that “Women use words like ‘blissful’, ‘pure contentment’, ‘heart-burstingly loving’. They report that their relationships are more harmonious and playful. Some report less menstrual pain and feeling and looking younger.” Men are saying they are attracted more to their partners than ever, stating “One man said, ‘I have fallen deeply in love with my wife really for the first time. We’re like teenagers… and are able to have intimacy and sex now that was simply unheard of before.”
How Is It Done?
It takes time to get used to the idea of having sex without an orgasm in the end. It may take weeks to get used to it, and even months. It can get frustrating at times, and you may overthink the whole thing. So here are some tips to use while getting started:
- Skin to skin contact
- Lying side by side
- Penetration should be slow
- Smile when making eye contact
- Look into your partner’s eyes
- Synchronize your breathing
- Spoon your partner in stillness for at least half an hour
- Massage your partner
- Hug your partner with the intent to comfort them
Remember the overall goal is about focusing on becoming one with your partner. If you would like to give it a try, begin by effectively communicating this relatively new type of sex. Explain why and how you feel this would help increase your intimacy, and ask for you their input and concerns. This new experience will connect the two of you on a deeper, sensual, more loving level.